Unknown Fear
I know you’re out there
I’ve felt you most of my life…
Lurking around the corners and in the shadows
Slithering your way into my mind.
For so long you’ve kept me running
Running away from where I was supposed to be
Running away from things I was supposed to see
You kept me so afraid that I missed so many opportunities.
You were always unknown… but somehow I knew who you were.
“What if I can’t do it?” You’d whisper in my ear.
“What if I fail?”
I used to buy into your manipulating suggestions
And your downright bullying
Anytime I tried to press through.
I remember how I used to feel… so afraid
Like I couldn’t do anything but fail.
I felt so inadequate… so small
Unprepared.
Vulnerable… naked.
Yes. I remember how you used to make me feel
Like I was supposed to live my whole life in you…
Fear.
You lied to me! But that’s what you do.
Never would I have guessed in a thousand lifetimes
That it is really you who are afraid.
Terrified of me – That I would fulfill the exact purpose
For which I was created.
A Brother’s Future
I sit and listen to the future of my past as my mother’s voice conveys tones of concern about my brother who’s growing up in my shoes, yet making his own steps in his direction. I sit listening to the future of my past as he lands on that middle ground between child and adult. My mother’s concern for him now becoming more obvious.
I tell her not to worry and she asks me to pray for him. What he is facing, I have faced in almost the same ways. Her voice lightens for a second then she tells me the reason why she worries. I hear the love in her voice for her #2 son… the same love she has for me, but different.
An Ideal Man
He is not a perfect man, for no one is blemish free
But in the dark expanses of the night
His presence gives a strong feeling of security.
Forces combine in order to destroy, but the Ideal Man
Will stand for what’s right.
He seeks understanding in all he does
Not afraid to express his emotions.
Willing to listen and not just talk
He’s calm, considerate and caring.
Though he may blow his top at times
He would not dare to abuse another.
The Ideal Man is not afraid
To apologize for his mistakes…
And if he is, he does so anyway.
He’s one to do his best to keep his word
Realizing that he role-models life for those who come behind him
And his peers.
He knows when to fight and when to walk away.
He’s hardworking and smart-working, and able to have fun.
He has a sense that is more than common.
Ideal Woman
Perfect? She doesn’t have to be.
The Ideal Man is not, so why should she?
The Ideal Woman should have a personality
A combination of humor, intelligence
Warm heart and strength.
She should have a sense of what she wants in a man, in life
And who she is.
Seeking truth in all situations
An Ideal Woman strives for excellence and elegance.
Her beauty comes from within
Radiating outward to enhance her physical form
The Ideal Woman should be caring
And supportive of the one she loves.
At times she may have to build him up.
An Ideal Woman isn’t afraid to express her feelings of affection
Not always waiting for him to make the first move.
Ready to dream and reach beyond the stars.
Realizing she doesn’t have to lower her standards nor expectations
To the man and life’s situations that try and dictate
That her worth is miniscule at best.
Keep Pressing
What? You thought it was going to get easier with each step along the path? As you approach the Enemy’s Camp did you think they’d just welcome you with open arms and let you through? You didn’t think about the fact that they hold all the keys and guard all the doors. If you want out – if you want to be free – then you’ve got to go to the core of that Camp to where the door to your freedom and the door to your bondage lie shut.
What? You thought this was going to be easy? Well it’s not. But keep pressing! What the Enemy doesn’t want you to realize is that the closer you get to your freedom the more afraid they become – so they will do whatever they can to keep you held at bay. Whatever keeps you complacent – you better believe will pop up to distract you – to cause you to waste all of your resources and your very life.
(CLICK HERE to watch the video for this poem)
It’s not about going where it’s safe… but where you’re needed.
Safe
Cops stay away – fearing for their lives
While families in urban cities face anxiety everyday…
Call for help and you’ll realize
Response time is like the government’s to Katrina…
While bullets fly in rapid succession
No chance for reflection as select corner blocks are ruled by thugs and drug lords
It’s Hell on earth for some.
In a System that devalues a family’s worth.
Come 96th street separation begins…
Segregation exists – you see it on subway trains
And in neighborhood schools where Color rules the terrain
Caucasian students are the minority.
The worst schools in the nation are a majority in ghetto plantations
Kids stand for hours to get through metal confiscation
Like at the school, in the news, where students protested and said:
We’re kids – not convicts!
The Grand Experiment
She was born into this room – 12 by 14 – this closet filled with only a broom, a toilet and a sink. She didn’t know what to think as she aged, but the room was all she ever knew – so she accepted it.
No windows to look through – just 4 walls, a ceiling and a floor – oh and then there was that door – which never opened – the opportunity to explore never given… and she never missed it.
Each time she awoke from sleep a meal would be waiting by that door. It smelled good, so by instinct she’d eat – never thinking to ask for more. Was it day or was it night? She had no concept of time. When it wasn’t dark – it was light – when the tungsten filament was set ablaze by electricity and the bulb came on. Even then she had nowhere to go in the small room with a ceiling and a floor. So she made up an imaginary friend out of the broom to explore the small expanse.